Thankful for the unexpected

the view from our deck at the Kingfisher

This weekend came with high expectations on my part. Not about the place we stayed or about anything material like that, but more about how it would make me feel and what it would 'do' for me. I guess it had been such a long time in coming that I had some time away from the kids that it packed a big punch for me.

I got a lot of what I expected. I had some great time to do nothing. I relaxed. I read more in two days than I have in two months. I got to do a whole lot of whatever I wanted and not feel the least bit guilty about it. I got to have some time alone with Tony and share some conversation over dinner, uninterrupted.

But it's more what I didn't expect to get from this weekend that has made me the most thankful. I realized how much I need to be with my kids. I was made aware of how much they want to be with me even when I don't feel worthy of it. Their love is the most honest and genuine that I will ever experience and it felt so good to discover that where I really feel the most like me is when I'm with them. This time away, short as it was, was long enough to bring me home again. Physically home and also mentally home.

On a completely different note... Cooper made the All Star team in roller hockey. From the minute he discovered that there was going to be an allstar game (way before his first game) he went on and on about how he really wanted to make that team. Tony and I gave eachother sideways glances wondering how we were going to break it to him when he didn't. He hasn't, after all, ever played hockey on any sort of a league. He didn't even own rollerblades up until 3 months ago. So we really didn't have any expectations of him being an 'all-star'. Well, he has proven that when he really wants something he will go after it. He's top-scorer on his team and 5th in the league.

Tony was really hoping that he would make the team and tonight after checking on the web-site we discovered he had. He was already asleep but Tony thought this was important enough info to warrant waking him up. His response: a very sleepy "that's good, Dad" and then straight back to sleep. I don't know who's more excited, Tony or Cooper. We'll see if Coop remembers the info in the morning or if he thinks it was all just a really great dream.